39 Comments
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Asha Piechowska's avatar

Two years ago I ended up living in a small Estonian town bordering Russia, by chance rather than choice. I found myself in a krushchevka in the mid bleak winter with nothing to do but reading, mostly obscure Baltic literature published in English that I’d purchased prior to my trip. Now it feels like it never happened but your Mongolian thoughts have brought back the feelings. Wishing you all the best in your writing journey

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Donna J Bailey's avatar

Thank you. I have only seen Mongolia from the boarder. But have stayed some time in parts of Siberia (3) and can relate to some of your experiences. I’ve also spent periods in UK TWO very different places. You will someday look back in this period, I hope, with fondness and wisdom. Recognizing the beauty of diversity in this world. Keep writing but stop with the tragic movies and books for a while. Yes life is very painful thus we must find beauty where we can. You have a gift for writing . Thank you again

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alexander gradus's avatar

Thank you for reading. It’s been a wonderful experience here, I think I’ve learned a lot. It will be hard to give up on the tragic books!

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Donna J Bailey's avatar

Have you read Hesse or all the great Russian books. They can also give you a downer. 🤓

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alexander gradus's avatar

I’m a big fan of the Glass Bead Game, and Tolstoy. I have a love for the 20th century Russian writers (Kharms, Platonov) over the 19th century ones:)

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Henry's avatar

Something frightfully relatable about this. I got a job offer email to come to China during Covid simply marked ‘reply with CAREER BREAK to apply’ and here I am years later, working in an IB school with some of the same conundrums. Your beautiful writing really struck a cord with me, as without direction I also meander.

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alexander gradus's avatar

The meandering young expat experience is the same wherever you go, I think!

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Wade Green's avatar

Good luck as you move back home and on your inevitable next adventure. I lived for 7 years in Kenya before moving back to the states , youve captured something here that I identify deeply with, even though I think my experience in Kenya was quite different than your Mongolian experience. Keep up the writing - this was a pleasure to read !

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alexander gradus's avatar

I think the experience of exile is universal, what’s odd is as much as the world is diverse the experience of being out of place is the same everywhere. Glad you enjoyed

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Ben Sims's avatar

this is one of the most interesting things i’ve read on this app; I can’t quite say why

I almost lived on Iona as the monastery’s gardener for a year, but falling in love got in the way

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alexander gradus's avatar

Glad you enjoyed it. Is this Iona off Scotland? I’ve always wanted to visit, actually

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Ben Sims's avatar

yep. the hebrides have that sweet combination of forbidding and homely

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alexander gradus's avatar

The other UK island on my to do list is Enys Men (because of the movie)

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Ben Sims's avatar

go when youre home!

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alexander gradus's avatar

another reason to leave..

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Thomas Mitchell's avatar

You are destined to return again later! Everything at its right time. What you’ve already had has been valuable - don’t let yourself rot, but also don’t move on, keep everything you’ve experienced within yourself.

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alexander gradus's avatar

Good advice, thank you

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Obsidian Blackbird.'s avatar

I love it. You are living my philosophy... MOVE IN THE DIRECTION OF THE BEATINGS :)

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alexander gradus's avatar

Exactly! Thanks for reading:)

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Bayanbat Buddy's avatar

It was very interesting to read foreigner experience here.

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MiserablyAfast's avatar

New piece eagerly awaited splendid splendid stuff

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alexander gradus's avatar

Glad it was worth the wait brother

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nadav's avatar

Absolutely incredible writing here. the world is so big

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alexander gradus's avatar

I often forget that I actually live here and that it's literally the furthest possible distance I could've gone from home. Big world

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tess♡'s avatar

Seeing that exact picture of the Blue Velvet set up felt like dejavu to me wth

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alexander gradus's avatar

Haha, I did post about it on here before didn't I?

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tess♡'s avatar

Oh phew I hope so

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alexander gradus's avatar

Or maybe I didn’t

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tess♡'s avatar

No don’t say that

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things and nothings's avatar

i could have written this. going on like 7 or 8 years in china. i love a lot about the place, but i’m kinda done. part of me wants to prove i can make it “in the real world” (which i dislike because it snacks of cultural chauvinism), part of me wants to set up for a continued nomadic future, part of me just wants to be home. i don’t care if it’s “worse.” i just don’t want my life to be here.

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Marcos Baratelli's avatar

I'm from Argentina. I´ve never left my country for more than two weeks at a time, but some of the feelings you describe here feel inevitable to me. I don't really know why, I have no plans to leave. But I'm still really young, so I guess there's time.

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Jillian's avatar

Thank you so much for sharing this glimpse into what its like to make a life where you don’t speak the language. I’ve had a million vacations that I don’t want to end. But then I remember that the lived life and the vacation are so different.

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Dawson Eliasen's avatar

This reminded me of Solenoid by Cartarescu, how you read it?

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Christopher F. Hansen's avatar

How did you like 2666?

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